英语笑话大全

There was once a local government official who loved his only son very much.
曾经有一个地方政府官员非常爱他的独子。

Mother: I sent my little boy for two pounds of plums and you gave him a pound and a half.
母亲：我给我的小儿子要了两磅李子，而你给了他一磅半。

A neighbor told us about a trip he took with his two-and-a-half-year-old son.
一位邻居告诉我们，他和两岁半的儿子一起旅行。

“Is ink so expensive, father?”
“墨水这么贵吗，爸爸？”

Dick’s mother made it a rule that if he came to the dinner table late again he w as not to speak a single word during the meal.
迪克的母亲立了一条规矩，如果他再次迟到，他在吃饭时一句话也不能说。

In the train Nick often put his head out of the window.
在火车上，尼克经常把头伸出窗外。

One day in class, the teacher assigned his students to write a composition—If I Am A Manager.
一天，在课堂上，老师让学生们写一篇作文——《如果我是经理》。

Teacher: Can you tell me anything about the great scientists of the 18th century?
老师：你能告诉我一些关于18世纪伟大科学家的事情吗？

Teacher: Jimmy, what are the three words which pupils use most often at school?
老师：吉米，学生在学校最常使用的三个词是什么？

“Look here, waiter, I just found a collar-button in my soup.”
“看这里，服务员，我刚刚在汤里发现了一个领扣。”

A soldier went to his colonel and asked for leave to go home to help his wife with the housecleaning.
一名士兵向他的上校请假回家帮助他的妻子打扫房间。

“Give me a dime for a cup of coffee?” asked the hobo the plainclothesman.
“给我一角硬币买杯咖啡好吗？”流浪汉向便衣警察讨要。