英语笑话大全

The doctor told Uncle Fudd that if he ran five miles a day for 300 days, he would lose 75 pounds.
医生告诉法德叔叔说，如果一天跑5 英里跑上300 天，他就可以减肥75 磅。

Two men who lived in a small village got into a terrible dispute that they could not solve. So they decided to talk to the town sage.
住在一个小村里的两个人发生了严重的争执，他们谁也无法解决，于是决定去找镇里的长老。

Next morning, a beautiful woman in a skintight exercise suit knocked on the man’s door.
第二天早上，一个穿着紧身运动衣的美女敲响了那个人的房门。

“Why not add some intrigue to your life and have an affair?” his friend suggested.
“你何不给你的生活加一点情节，搞点婚外恋呢？”唐建议说。

She answered the phone to hear a repentant voice.
她接电话时听到一个忏悔的声音说：

My arm started to hurt me and I asked the doctor to examine it.
我的胳膊开始疼，便让医生诊断一下。

Driving down a winding country road, a man came upon a youth running hard, three huge dogs snarling at his heels.
一个人驱车沿着一条弯曲的乡间公路向前行驶，突然看到一个年轻人拼命奔跑，三只大狗追着他的脚后跟狂叫着。

A teacher was asking a student a lot of questions, but the student couldn’t answer any of them.
老师问了一个学生很多问题，但这个学生却一个也答不上来。

Three pastors got together for coffee one day and found all their churches had bat-infestation problems.
有一天，三个牧师去喝咖啡，发现他们的教堂都有被蝙蝠困扰的问题。

一个女人对医生诉苦说她的丈夫缺乏激情。
A woman complained to the doctor about her husband’s lack of passion.

Arriving at a dude ranch, Johnny exclaimed, “ Mom, look at them bow-legged cowboys!”
抵达一个度假农场，约翰尼大声说道：“妈妈，你看他们那些罗圈腿牛仔！”

“We have a skunk in the basement, ” shrieked the caller to the police.“ How can we get it out?”
“我们的地下室有一只臭鼬，”打电话者对警察尖声叫道，“我们怎么才能把它弄出来呢？”